I recently attended a business networking breakfast. Each attendee had to stand up and give a 60-second talk about their business. As I listened to everyone else (and nervously awaited my turn) it occurred to me that while having adequate insurance, sorting out your computer problems, landscaping, selling cars, and attaining bank loans are an important aspect of today’s economy, nothing was actually more important than sex.
Don’t believe me? Think about it. Along with food and sleep, sex is one of the most important and most natural things we do to ensure the survival of the Human Species. If, for some bizarre reason we all stopped having sex, the human race would disappear off the face of the earth within 100 years. But I have no doubt that nature made it enjoyable so that we’d keep doing it.
Most sexual activities require lubrication, and adequate lubrication is a big part of enjoyable, safe and healthy sex.
So follow the logic: lubrication is fundamental to pleasurable sex, and pleasurable sex is fundamental to ensuring the survival of human kind. And yet, we are often too embarrassed to discuss the nuances of our sexual needs openly – even with our sexual partners.
Eventually, my turn came to speak and I introduced myself as the founder of FlowMotion. “I produce and market a BioGro NZ Certified Organic Personal Lubricant called FlowMotion Organic Lubricant.” I said shakily. I’m not embarrassed to talk about sex or lubricants, I just don’t like talking in front of groups of people. What I do enjoy however, is watching for the penny to drop, to see the reaction of people when they actually understand what I just said.
It’s at this point I notice the variety of responses. Some people get uncomfortable, especially the over 50’s men, who squirm in their seats and look away. But I also recognise a look that I can only describe as a ‘knowing kind of relief’ from some of the women in the room, as if they are thinking, “Finally! Someone to talk about it – and offering a healthy alternative.”
Twenty seconds in to my 60-second talk, everyone was laughing loudly (must have been something I said). There is no way to talk about it without innuendo, and it often bringing up personal issues for people.
I pressed on amidst the laughter and I made the few points I’d intended; the importance of sex to human survival, the fact that we are sometimes uncomfortable talking about it, that sex requires lubrication, and the very important fact that mucous membranes absorb more than if you ingest the same ingredient, so we really need to take care of what sort of lubricants we put ‘down there’.
After my 60-second speech, I sat down (hands still shaking) knowing that at the very least everyone had had a good laugh, that no one would soon forget what I did for a job, and perhaps there were a few more people in the room who understood that sex and lubrication was far more important than they had ever imagined.
But why are people uncomfortable about talking about ‘Lubrication’? It’s often the ‘issues’ thing, such as;
- dealing with the embarrassment factor, knowing how and when to talk to your partner about it
- denial that you might actually need a lubricant, as if needing a lubricant is a slight on your ability to either be aroused, or to arouse your partner
- feelings of inadequacy if you can’t produce enough of your own lubricant
- dealing with the physical effects of medications, surgery, menopause, childbirth, etc…
- coming to terms with relationship and/or sexual issues
- uncertainty about choosing the best kind of lubricant
The list goes on!
Let’s start with the very basics. What is lubrication? Nature has done a pretty good job of providing us with our own lubricating mechanisms.
Female lubrication: During sexual arousal in women, blood flow to the vagina, vulva, and clitoris increases, causing the veins in the genital tissues to dilate, making the whole area feel full (‘vasocongestion’). At this time, a sort of sweating reaction occurs which creates a wet secretion.
Male lubrication: Pre-ejaculate fluid (or ‘pre-cum’) in men does more than just lubricate; it also seems to neutralise residual acidity in the vagina, creating a more favourable environment for the viability of sperm. Unlike sperm (that is made in the testicles), pre-cum is produced in a man’s Cowper’s gland. So pre-cum and sperm are produced in two different parts of a man’s the body. Note: Not all pre-cum fluid contains sperm, but don’t bank on that if you are trying to avoid pregnancy!
So there is the short version of the natural male/female lubrication process. But there are many reasons why people lose the ability to produce enough of their own lubrication. And even if they do produce enough of their own lubrication, there are times when you might like a little more.
Do you need more lubrication? If sex feels dry or painful, you need more. There are also times when there just isn’t enough, or none at all; when you use toys, or for anal sex, for example. Lubricants can help with foreplay and help encourage and stimulate natural secretions. Lubricants can even ease penetration if your or your partner is on the large side.
Vaginal dryness can happen during medical treatments for illnesses, leaving vaginal skin as thin tissue paper. So can menopause when hormones levels drop. Adequate lubrication is essential to ensure delicate genital skin isn’t damaged during sex. Damaged tissues leaves you more susceptible to infection and disease.
How do you choose the right sexual lubricant?
Read labels. Do your research. There are many articles on the web about the effects of chemical ingredients. Many brands contain nasty chemical ingredients and irritants. They burn, leave a sticky mess, and their ingredients are linked to causing thrush (yeast infections), allergies, and even cancer. Remember, delicate genital skin is a mucus membrane that is highly absorbent. You can also check out our own list HERE.
Choose a lubricant that is natural and safe to use. Always use a water based lubricant with condoms, but don’t use oil-based lubricants with condoms as the oil breaks down the latex.
Remember, most sex requires lubrication – that is totally natural. if you produce enough of your own, great! If not, be sure you choose a healthy option. Look for Certified Organic labels so you can be sure that at least 95% of the ingredients are certified organic (beware brands that claim ‘Made with Certified Organic Ingredients’, as they are only required to use 70% organic ingredients).
Adequate lubrication is important for safe, healthy, pleasurable sex. And pleasurable sex is a key component to the joys of intimacy!
FlowMotion Organic Lubricant is a BioGro NZ Certified Organic, water based personal lubricant that is the healthiest choice available. It is formulated to be as close to the body’s own natural lubrication as possible. Go with the FlowMotion!